Watch those around you

 People are so quick to judge you based off of anything and they fail to realize they are the ones that trigger you. They tell you all the things you want to hear and never do them. They will trigger you and uses you and make it seem like they are genuine but you will just be another person that they played. They do not really love you. They only want someone in their corner so they can prey off of you. They want to be able to have someone to play. 

They only tell you that to keep you around to pretend that they are not like the other that done you wrong when they truly are. They basically do things to make sure that they keep you on your toes and then when you figure it out and get tired of it, they will leave you just because. 

When you don't believe their lies that they told you along with the excuses and other things, then you become a problem for them and once you see through every single piece of excuse they gave then they get mad. They will try to use what you told them and your weaknesses against you. They will play your heart strings, tag you along and then get mad when you don't do what they want you to anymore. 

They will keep you around just because. Do not fall for the lies that they will tell you. They will try to break you down and build you the way they want to. They will force those around you to leave or for you to leave them and they will fight with you because of it. 

Anyone that is around you, they will say tried to break up the relationship. Anyone around you that can see how they really are and treat you they will blame them and try to isolate you and then when you call them out for everything and every lie they ever told they will coward away and then come back with something else just because they want to keep fighting with you for no reason at all. Then when you call it out they will become the victim and flip the script and make it seem like it was you and your crazy. 

Watch who you love, not everyone is truthful and loyal like they say. 

A strong woman

 When you are a strong woman you are independent. You will do things on your own and not care. You will pull your weight and make sure those around you and your family will and can make it. The old saying goes a strong independent woman will not need a man to do anything for them they got it themselves. Yes it would be nice to have some help from time to time but sometimes the help that you get is no good and does no good. 

We basically heard every excuse and all kinds of things from I will do something and they never do it or the reasons why they cannot do anything. We heard it all and it's the same thing either from the same person or different people. Never get your hopes up because they will surely tell you things that you want to hear or they will tell you things they think you want to hear. I have heard it all from don't worry to I will do something and been disappointed day in and day out waiting for it to get done and guess what months to years down the road it has not been done or when I get tired something being a way and I try to do something for myself then they just jump up and try to do it and do it and give you some excuse of why they haven't done it.

 EXCUSES, EXCUSES, EXCUSES BLAME, BLAME, BLAME. A human can only take so much and then its like we get tired of having to tell what to do. We get tired of being blamed and hearing the excuses. We ask a simple thing and we get nothing but excuses or time they will do it and it never gets done. It all just piles up.

 Us women sometimes decide to take things in our own hands cause we are sick of it. We ask for simple things to be done and we get disappointed and so we learn to pick up our own weight and carry it and not wait for anyone. We make sure our family is good and bills are paid. Waiting for people to do stuff can get tiring and start to pile up. This could be stressful and harmful. Some may not understand this but most will.

Life of fear.. A BITTER TRAGEDY

Abuse,  pain, blame, force, trauma, hurt, tears, suffering, arguing, silent cries, whispers, fake smiles, cracked faces, broken. It's my fault, I'm sorry,  I love yous, trust, misery, bruises, bleeding, broken bones, crushed, depression, anxiety, fear, sleepless nights, ptsd(doesn't have to be military related.) Suicidal; thoughts and tendencies. Emptiness, emotions, alone, emo, schizo, Alcohol, Unloved, Just here, suffer, name calling, torn, love..., no love, regrets, truth, excuses, sorrow, endless years, finding yourself, defeated, nothing to no one, lonely, no support, friendless, no family, DEATH

WHORE, SLUT, BITCH, WORTHLESS, WHALE, FAT, CARELESS, YOU DON'T CARE, STUPID, RETARD, YOU SHOULD DIE, GO KILL YOURSELF, NO ONE CARE FOR YOU, I DON'T LOVE YOU, YOU WILL NEVER BE NOTHING, YOUR NOTHING TO ME, YOU HURT ME, ~ MOST OF WHAT IVE BEEN TOLD ALL MY LIFE. 

Love is a 4 letter word that means nothing if its not shown.

Trust is a 5 letter word that doesn't mean anything if its broken.

Sorry is just a 5 letter word that gets thrown around when something happens and means nothing if its repeated over and over again.

Promises, a 8 letter word that is always broken by doing the opposite and repeating something you said you wouldn't do.

Apologies mean nothing if your just going to do the same thing over and over and over again day after day or a month after months.

Blame, something you go through when they don't want to be responsible for their own actions, so it takes off of them and put more on you.

Depression, something you feel going through this. Something that causes you to break and want to be alone because of the person you loved and who you thought love you has done all this to you. It also comes from blaming yourself for someone else's mistakes and can come from many other things.

Fear something you live in when promises are broken and i love yous turn to blaming you for something you didn't do. Something all these words make you feel after it all happened.

Admitting to something you have done is never so easy but telling the truth is worth way more than you would know. Telling lies can cause lots of fights and tension no matter what it is. 

 Everyone goes through this it does not have to be women, it's men and kids who also go through this. Some of them even blame themselves for someone else problem but it's not their fault.

Lies, things that they feed you when they are promising you something... Something that you believe for so long and that they tell you to get you off their case, backs and out their faces...Lies can never be actually fixed... Once a liar always a liar...

Bleeding all over and crushed on the inside, spitting in the face of someone you love, calling them a bitch and a whore, stupid, worthless,accusing them of things they have not done... blaming you for something you cannot control being pushed, shoved, beaten, abused, mentally, physically broken, crushed, and being told this will never happen, this is not me but it is, it is you, this is not love and it's best if you leave this situation it can get worse to the point you don't love them you just are scared to leave. 

No one deserves this! No one deserves to be blamed for someone else's problems, mistakes or anything that is going on. It takes a lot to keep trying to push through but sometimes it's best to escape no matter how much you love the person or no matter how much they say they love you and it will never happen again. 

These are what people go through. People suffering due to other people's actions and people don't realize it. They blame you for someone else's or their action because they don't wanna blame them or themselves. They don't realized that the person they blame hurts because of it. They don't understand what it does to or how it effects a person and they let the other person get away with it.
Karma is a bitch and what goes around comes around. You reap what you sow.

Alone...

Do you know what it feels like when your alone.... Everything hits you all at once....Everything feels like its your fault... your depression hits you so hard that you cry at the littlest thing.... Have you ever felt alone, like no one will ever understand even if you tried to explain it but words just won't come out and they can't express the way you feel? Have you ever tried to talk but the tears kept rolling and coming down your face and nothing comes out but the sounds of cries that you've been trying to hold back but it's to much so they just show on their own and the only thing that comes out of your mouth is that weird sound that comes from your throat because all the tears have you choked up and you just wanna let it all go and watch it destory itself and you like it did on the inside.

It Hurts. Poem

It hurts when someone leaves.
It hurts to find out when a person pass away and you will never see them again
It hurts when people uses you takes all your kindness
It hurts to hear a child crying because you don't know whats wrong
It hurts when everything is crushing you all at once and you slowly feel life escape
Nothing is the same
Everything Changes no matter how much you try to keep it the same
Sometimes it hurts to change
Being blamed hurts