Cowin E7 Headphones

 I personally love my Cowin headphones! They are not heavy at all and do not hurt my ears like the others does. They are Bluetooth and or aux cable. 

They are USB charger supported which is nice and they are noise canceling so you cannot hear a thing and there is a button for that so you can activate it and deactivate it whenever you want to. 

There is also  a mic so you can answer phone calls if you need. The bass in these are nice and deep and they just over all sound great. I love the fact that they do not die as quick as others so you can really use these all day if you wanted to. 

These are great for work if you are looking for a pair. They come with their own little carrying sleeve and they do not slide off your head when you are wearing them they are a tight fit. 

These are perfect for those who cannot stand loud noises, crowded places or just anywhere where people are talking loud or anything like that. These headphones will cancel it out and will allow them to be able to listen to their music and concentrate on where they are going without having a panic or anxiety attack while walking in a loud and crowded room.

I use these normally when I am gaming and have not had a problem with them at all. 

Only thing about these is you cannot use the aux cable on them when they are off, they have to be on to use them.

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Struggling with mental health

 I personally have been struggling with my mental health for years. Growing up was not so easy for me. I was bullied for the way that I was, I was bullied for the clothes that I wore, the way I looked, my size and so much more. It gotten to the point I no longer wanted to go to school and I would fight with my mother when all she wanted was the best for me.

 I didn't want to open up to anyone because they would make fun of me more and laugh and judge me for getting help.

I became suicidal and never really bothered anyone. I did not really have friends and no one seemed to really care about me throughout school. I was like an outcast. I wanted to go to therapy and talk to people about it but we could not afford it so I decided to take up writing and that is how I got to where I am today. 

People would use me and get what they wanted and never talk to me and that is kind of what it is like now. I do not talk to anyone and I stay to myself. 

Truthfully, I hated how I treated her and I treat her so much better now. I personally understood where she was coming from. She was raised from a somewhat broken home. 

Her mother did not show her love like a child should be loved and her father basically was always about his money. Her mother and father would fight like cats and dogs and she dropped out of high school cause they always moved. She then moved in with her grandmother and her grandmother raised her the best she could. 

My mother then became the parent that she needed growing up and she understood a lot of things. 

Mt father which him and my mother have been married for 24 years now. They got married a year before I was born. 

My father, had a rough life which hints at abuse but never would fully state. He came from a home where things were not fair. He always talks about the olden days where the kids where always last and the adults would eat before them. He talks about remembering where when it was his time to eat, they had skimmed over food and sometimes they have food that was put back and some had bite marks in it.

His mother, was never really there his father was in the military and basically he wasn't home. He was raised by his grandmother and his grandmother and his uncle's raised him well although his uncle's were drunks and his grandpa made moonshine.

 He is the type to give the shirt off his back. He is a hard working honest man. He has rough edges that this life has given him but once you get past that you can truly see him for who he is besides this rough person who he presents himself as. He is a hard person sometimes but that's how life built him.

But, somewhere down the line  him and his mom made a bond that was unbreakable. His mom was closer to him than his dad and I completely understood. His mom was the person everyone needed in their life. His dad was a quiet type around people and it's like something along the lines causes him issues.

His teenage and early adult years were rocky but I understand. He made a lot of mistakes in life and he's always speaking about them and always talking about knowledge. He is a wise man and someone everyone would like to have in their life. 

Raising me for sure was not easy for them and I know but they did it. There was times we were struggling and couldn't really get any help had issues getting food sometimes due to they made to much for assistance and couldn't pay the bills at times which life happens.

Both parents have been there for their family through everything. They are giving the love that they did not have as a kid growing up and I personally love it.

I now as an mother, a wife have been diagnosed with PCOS, anxiety, depression and I self diagnosed for autism in which we all suspected it was there and now I know where the kids got it from which is okay with me. 

The whole point besides giving you background of my family is to let you know it comes from somewhere and starts somewhere even if you do not realize it. Everyone struggles with it and do not be afraid to reach out. Reaching out can help you more than you know. 

Never feel ashamed to get help. If someone judges you don't worry about them because life is never easy and karma is real. 

Mentally drained, physically drained

 Ever feel like your alone? Ever feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders and you have to do everything since others and family are not doing what they said they would or you feel like your repeating yourself over and over trying to get help but they aren't helping you and doing things their way when your telling them what needs to be done and what is causing you stress. Yes I am currently in that state. I am mentally drained and physically drained. 

I suffer from anxiety and lots of it and it feels like the weight of everything is on me. I am trying so hard daily to keep it all together but juggling life, trying to find remote work, trying to sell my vinyl stickers and decals, trying to get YouTube up or something to support my family all while trying to juggle college and make sure things are going smoothly in the only place that was suppose to give peace but it's not. I have felt this way for the last five years and it's only getting worst. I have openly expressed myself of what could help but it's like I'm talking to a brick wall. I have wore myself down to the point I'm exhausted to the point I don't sleep at night and sleep a little during the day.

I'm the one writing all the blog posts that can't get AdSense due to one is adult content and it ruined my other blogs from getting it. I'm filling out job application for remote jobs since being an affiliate marketer isn't paying the bills. I am trying to help myself since all I have been doing is putting others first and their needs. 

I cared way to much for others when all they did was use me to the point I don't want to help anyone anymore. It's to the point my circle was small but it's even smaller now since I'm getting rid of the negativity and those that just want to take and take and take and use and use and use. I noticed a lot more positivity coming from it but I have a big heart and it hurts but I had to do what I had to to get my happiness and peace back. 

I am applying to jobs daily monthly weekly, trying to find something but its like no one is hiring and wants to hire. It is getting exhausting trying to find work especially something I can do remotely since I have kids and its not easy since most remote jobs are phone jobs. 

I also suffer from PCOS and that sucks. It causes more anxiety and depression. It causes pain and makes you feel alone. It causes hormone imbalance and can make you flip on everyone over nothing. They won't do anything but give birth control to counter act it something that can end up causing more anxiety and depression. I don't want anymore anxiety. I don't want anymore depression. I want to be at peace. I don't want to suffer anymore. 

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Anxiety

 Something they do not tell you about anxiety is that it gets worst and it doesn't matter what you do. Anxiety can cause so much including overthinking all the time and that can put stress on your body even if you don't realize it. 

If you hear a certain thing, see certain things, think certain things it can destress you and trigger you so bad to the point you just start breathing heavily and you won't be able to calm it. It gives chest pains and so much more. It can become crippling if you are not careful.

It can keep you awake a night worrying and over thinking things. You will be insomniac and then sleep during the day most of the day and if there's a sudden noise, it can cause your heart to drop and feel like it's falling sending you into panicking. Trust me I was there also and some nights I still am having this. 

This is also coming from PCOS and trauma that I have had through out my life. I sometimes have to lay in the dark, listen to rain videos and ocean videos on youtube to allow myself to sleep and try to get as comfortable as possible because I can and will start panicking at night for no reason at all its just my mind getting worked up over basically nothing and causes me to over think breathe heavy and just start hyperventilating. 

The best thing for you to do is to basically avoid anything that triggers you, I mean at sometime or another you are going to end up going into crowds, and doing things that bothers you but do it when you are ready and when you are at ease. Don't rush and don't panic through it just breathe through it and have those around you that you trust and knows you. 

Do things that you enjoy and if you want to try something new go a little at a time and not force completely into it since your body will start sending languages that it is un-comfy and that will cause a lot of distress. 

But do things you like and if that is playing video games, drawing, reading, visiting nature is a good idea with anxiety and grounding yourself is also a good thing it helps you with the universe. If you don't know how to ground yourself, just go outside barefoot and walk in the dirt and if you can sit on the grass with your feet in the dirt and meditate, go outside talk to the plants, and the trees and just basically learn yourself.