This is not a relationship, It is captivity

 

If a person is doing nothing but making excuses and trying to make you feel bad about yourself, they are not into you and they are not for you. A person who loves you and is into you would never try to make you feel bad and will always do things for you. 

They will not mouth off, make you question things, act like they love you for you when actuality you are not their type and blame you for everything and make excuses and give you reasons that are not even true of why they do things. 

They will not leave you on a cliff hanger and tell you all the things that you want to hear just to keep you dragging along behind them. Don't worry they are good at saying everyone else is doing things when it is them and try to manipulate you into believing them. 

They won't give you any attention and make it seem like it is your fault when you have not done anything to them nor to deserve this. They would rather give their attention to everyone else besides you and when you ask or want to talk about it, they will get mad and tell you not to bother them and makes up reasons and excuses but when you finally get tired, had enough and leave, then they will come back complaining, talking about they do love you, they do miss you when actually they only miss the things you did and the company that you gave them. 

They don't care about you, it is all a game to them. No matter how many times they seem to want to fix it, they really don't. They just want to get what they can get from you and use you to the point that you break and you cannot even heal yourself, nor recognize what is going on.

Same routines

 As a person who likes doing the same routines, certain routines get old. Such as begging for a person to do right, arguing and fighting with a person that supposedly loves you everyday and begging them to see what they are doing to you and trying to show them what they are doing to others and how what they are saying is not right or sound right because the part that they are saying basically is basically the opposite of  what they are saying.

It gets to a point you have to withdraw yourself, your love and care to basically save yourself from spiraling anymore further down. Loving a person takes a lot of work if they are not loving themselves. It takes a lot of work even more to lie about loving a person and or subjects around a person. 

Say a person claims that they don't talk to people because they are antisocial but then come up to say they talk to people randomly then to come up and say they do not talk to the person they claim and then lie and say oh yeah we talk so if you are lying about that then what else are you lying about. 

Trying to search through everything that was told and go through every part and think about it while watching how a person moves it gets old. You start to see a lot of holes in every story and everything that does not make sense. 

You can basically see where the story was either used on other to manipulate them or basically where it was fabricated again and again to basically make it work on others to get them to feel sorry for them or to make you want to stick with them and care because that is what they want you to believe. They will blame whoever including you for things that you did not due and then try to use it as leverage to win you and make you stay and do what they want you to do. 

They will become the victim and play victim while victim blaming you and make everything some how your fault. Do not fall for this it will become catastrophe and you cannot fix this. It only gets worst and you will end up getting hurt in the process and its not worth it.

Once you can see how the person is moving and repeating it gets old and you end up wanting something  new. Trust me, loving a toxic person and begging them to be a decent human and love you the way you need to be loved gets old, hell begging a person in general gets old. 

You end up cutting them off eventually and then you feel bad or they sweet talk you into a place that you don't want to be in again and again because the way they word their words and then everything falls apart as you try to fix it and then you end up getting hurt and shying away from them more and more until you get the courage to just up and leave because you realize its not what you want anymore and they are not the one you want to be with because of all the times they showed you what they are doing.

 They don't love you they are only using you.

It is time for something new and a new journey at that one.