Anxiety

Anxiety? Yeah me too! Everyone gets anxiety and it sucks. A lot of people do not know how much one person may struggle with everyday tasks. Anxiety is not something you can just get over. It is not just something that magically goes away.

It is something that lives with you. It is the not being able to speak. The nervous of trying to say something but afraid of the backlash or what someone is going to say. It is the panic attacks, the seen the unseen. It's the nervously shaking when things don't go as plan. The what ifs the constant worrying how something will go.  It's the over reacting, the involuntary movements and shaking.

 The pacing back and forth. The reinsurance that things are okay, that no one is mad. Its the talking in public but getting sweaty hands all while just trying to order food or just talking to someone you do not know. 

Being bullied in my childhood has caused some of this but that is not the major factors. Being afraid of speaking out due to your parent always has the say and the fear that you get when you do something they disapprove up and not sure how they are going to handle it. 

A therapist once told me sour candy is the way to go. Sour candy calms the nervous system allowing your body to relax in which its kind of like when you suffer a traumatic event, they tell you to play Tetris so that you mind does not focus on what happened or what is happening, it rerouted to you playing a complex game so now you focus on that instead.  

I use Stress relief tablets that helps out a lot and this allows me to be calm and not worry and it does not allow me to overreact. 

I also keep gum on me and chew that so I focus on that instead of things around me. 

Pretty much anything to keep your mind focus and not allowing you to dart off topic or start panicking helps. There are also anxiety rings you can get which also works good. You can turn them and fidget with them which are cool! 

There are all kinds of Anxiety fidgets here!

Marketing third party

 
One of the hardest platforms to affiliate market for is Amazon and Commission junction. I say this because it is hard trying to figure out things to market and a lot of people are marketing them so its competition trying to make sure you are being seen. Commission Junction is a third party platform where you can apply to stores and sites and become an affiliate marketer with them if you are chosen. 

This is the easy part. The hard part is trying to share the links because they do not show up as in the store. Commission junction has their own tracker ID's on them and it makes it harder to sale because people are not going to look at it as a real site.

 They are going to think it is a scam site so you have to go out of you way making a short link for it using some kind of short link maker and hope it keeps your tracker in it. I personally write blog post and hyper link the links into it that way no one can tell that its from a third party site or from whatever I am trying to market. This also allows people to know where to get one and makes it nice and neat. 

For an example, here is my review blog! 

Here is my gaming blog 

The mind poem

The mind is a complex and mysterious place, a maze of shifting thoughts and tangled emotions. It drifts in circles, flirting with possibilities, dancing with doubts. 

Often, it resists resolution, preferring instead to entertain contradiction. There’s a strange comfort in hesitation, a thrill in being provoked—because in those uncertain moments, the mind is most alive, exploring the edge of what could be.

But then, something changes. A flicker of clarity appears. The noise quiets. A decision emerges—not always loudly, but with undeniable weight. And once the mind is made up, that choice takes root. 

It stands, weathered and unmoving. It matters less which door you choose—because whichever one you walk through, something is going to bloom. A truth. A lesson. A version of you that didn’t exist before.

Don’t wait too long. Time has a way of narrowing the paths before us. What once felt wide and full of promise begins to fade into a single thread. And there you are, standing still at the crossroads, watching the horizon pull farther away.

So move—boldly, even if uncertainly. The mind may be complex, but the heart knows when it’s time to step forward.

Affiliate Marketing

 

Let me just say, I have been an affiliate marketer for about 8 years and there are a ton of ups and downs. For starters, affiliate marketing is over saturated and so many people are doing it because it is quick and easy cash sometimes.

 If you happen to get on with Amazon, here is a warning. You only get 180 days to make three qualifying sales and if you fail to do that they kick you out of the program in which you are going to end up reapplying to and trust me, Amazon is a hard platform to market for because everyone is doing it and it is popular. 

There are going to be a lot of companies that will not accept you because you do not meet their criteria and it is nothing against you. This is just the company and looking for a certain target and demographic. 

Affiliate marketing is really hard when you do not have the following because you are going to have to work extremely hard to try to promote and give people reasons why they need the product and or get it and trust me sometimes this is hard because as I said so many people are doing it. 

If you do decide to go into this kind of career have a back up plan because this is not going to bring in cash quickly. A lot of companies are giving you cents of a dollar sometimes depending on the contract agreement and you will end up getting cheated in the long run. 

So no this is not going to bring you quick cash. A lot of programs pay in 30 days some pays at the beginning of the year and to be honest, a lot of companies have a threshold that makes it hard to meet the goals. Some are $10 and some are higher but it is hard when you are getting cents of a dollar. Some of my commission bases are 15%, 5% and 10% and that is it. 

 Also watch third party platforms such as Commission Junction and Impact or any other one that will charge you annual maintenance fees or whatnot and end up taking some out of your balance. 

So be sure to do your research before applying to some of these affiliate sites because some of these are just getting free promotions from you and you may not get paid because of this. 

If you are trying to market, I highly suggest social medias and if you can use hashtags to be sure you are reaching those you want to reach. This will take time to build up, don't beat yourself up over it just be sure you have a plan B for when this does not work out. 

If  you can, make a blogger. Bloggers are free to use and you will not be wasting your money on something that could not make it. It will allow you to make blog posts about the products and you can add tags to it making it pop more along with SEO which allows you to show up in the search engines. You then can share you blog around and it just makes it easier to keep up with. 

It is pretty much all about building yourself up and figuring out what works for you and what does not. You may find one company that you hit it off with and can make a little bit of cash with while others may not work out.

Here are some of my partners I am with. Click here! 

 

My first Camera: Canon Rebel T7

 My first camera ever was the Canon Rebel t7 and if you ever was thinking about getting into photography, I highly recommend this one. 

This camera was simple to use and took amazing pictures. I had no issues with this camera and I honestly regret having to sale it. This camera had different settings for each type of photography and pretty much captured every moment I wanted. 

 My favorite thing to do was to go around and take nature photography because nature never stays the same and it is forever changing. No moment can be captured more than once. There will always be something changing into it. 

It has different modes ranging from sports, to portrait, close up, food, night portrait, landscape, creative auto, flash, scene intelligent auto and movie. This camera was made to capture any type of moment no matter what it is. You can record with this camera also. 

Get a Canon Rebel T7 here! 

Older house sometimes a lot of work

 Living in a home that was built in 1975 that an slum lord owned sucks. If you did not know, last year we bought the house we were renting for about 10 years. The original owner was pretty much a slum lord and refused to pretty much take care and fix anything. 

He then sold it to a guy who actually tried to fix it and keep it up. The guy then sold it to us and we bought it due to fear and being a low income household with kids and almost homeless that could not find anything affordable and cheaper than were we lived for 10 years. It took a lot to get the rest of the money needed to buy it but we did.

Let me just say, the first owner we let him know about a leak and then he got mad and refused to fix it and so the addon to the house has have new drywall because the rain and water over the years has washed it out on one side. All that is needed is insulation and drywall. There was also a hole in the back yard that was sinking and he refuse to fix it also. 

The second guy actually patched the roof and made it so it would not leak but over all we are going to have to get the roof redone but so far only two leaks we have noticed one has been patched over and no longer leaks, the second one it just started but we are working on trying to get patched. It only leaks when the winds are up really really high and the shingles move but other than that there is no leak. 

I have to come up with the fund to replace the septic tank because of the age of it, the top busted out of it but it still works and everything still goes down. 

The AC oh the poor AC is really old and we have to call a maintence about every year for it. It needs coils cleaned now and a new thermostat. Last year it had trouble cooling due to being high heats and it was struggling. This year a mouse decided it wanted to jump into the blower fan and it got ate. It unbalanced things and made it sound like a lawn mower. 

The vent in one of the rooms is no longer connected to the system and we have a window unit in there to keep it cooled off but we have ran into issues with it because it makes moisture and a lot of water on top of the unit and I am trying to find ways to fix this issue. 

The hall closet that was once a fireplace also lets in heat and causes mildew on the ceiling and it is right there at the room that has the AC unit. 

I am not complaining because my family and I have a roof over our head and do not have a rent payment or a mortgage it just kind of sucks of the not knowing that this was going to happen. I mean things happen that you cannot control all the time so it is understandable and the house itself is old and needs updating so maybe this is a way we can update it but parts at a time because it is expensive.  

My health 2025

 My health in 2020-2024 was rocky. I was diagnosed with PCOS and ovarian contusion in which my OBGYN just brushed off the contusion part when I went to her. It took this year to be told oh yeah it was twisted. I have suffered with nausea, vomiting, pain, diarrhea, fatigue, and appetite loss all through out them years and it never really got better but it went into remission.

 I even had an colonoscopy and biopsy and endoscopy done to make sure everything was good in which they found diverticulitis, eternal hemorrhoids and colitis. I ended up going on without relief and help. I was given bentyl and nausea medication along with ibuprofen, Tylenol and other things I was given by my doctors including antibiotic medications. I was even eating raw ginger to help with my nausea and it actually helped.  I also broke out in hives and not sure what is causing it or why it is happening.

My GI told me to start taking probiotic and I started to take digestive enzymes and that also helped out a lot. 

This year 2025, I am dealing with itching skin, itchy hands, itchy feet, my pancreatitis is coming and going, I get nauseated, having chest pains, feels like I have kidney stones and pain, and the diarrhea has came back. Some days are better than others and its just taking a toll on me. I sometimes can eat more and sometimes I can barely eat. I also breaking out in hives and still do not know what is causing it or why it is happening. Hopefully soon I can find some answers.