Marriage and relationships

 

Marriage and relationships are commitment. It is loving each other unconditionally through the ups and downs. It is being there for one another when things are not looking up and helping them. It is not a one sided thing. It is 50/50. Their problems are your problems and your problems are theirs. 

If you are not ready for commitment and helping each other of if you are to busy to notice when the other person needs you and is struggling while you are out doing your own thing, let the person go. It is not worth them wasting their time, love, care and drowning in issues expecting you to come along and help them when in actuality you're not going to. 

If someone else has your attention let the person you are holding on to go so that they can find someone that is for them instead of being led on thinking that you actually want them and want to spend your life with them. 

People who genuinely cares and loves you ends up planning their whole life with you. They want to experience it all with you but if you don't want to spend your life with them and be everything they need in life and all you do make excuses all the time, blame, assume accuse them and make them feel less than a person, you don't deserve them and they do not deserve the treatment that you put them through. 

They deserve better, they deserve to be loved and be cherished. They do not deserve to suffer from you because you aren't ready. They do not deserve to be broken because you are broken, have trust issues, jealousy, narcist, Stockholm syndrome, have been called out and confronted because you are doing things that they know you are doing but you are trying to pretend you're not doing it and try to make it seem like the person is crazy and keep throwing off on them because you do not want to admit the truth.

 Gut feelings never lie. Trust me, we can tell when something isn't right and things are off. 

Sometimes we just let it go until we can no longer take it and other times we try to handle it right on the spot. Just sit back and watch, karma is quick. 

Opening up

 Opening up to let people in is never easy. People can end up using you and hurting you which makes it to where you no longer want to open up to anyone else. 

They tell you they will be there for you when you need them but then they show you time and time again that they won't and they are only going to hurt you in the long run. 

I often sit around and trying to figure out what went wrong and how to fix it and ways to fix it because I always feel like I am the problem but I am learning that I am not the problem. I cannot make someone understand me, I cannot make anyone be honest, I cannot make anyone do anything. They are their own person and it is on them to do right or wrong. 

I personally, am tired of opening up to people. I do not want to keep having to restart with people and explaining to them that I am tired of getting hurt, I am tired of restarting and giving my trust to them just only for them to be like the others and leave and make excuses and then just hurt me over and over. This is getting old. I am always honest to people.

 I always give them the benefit of the doubt when they don't really deserve it and because of this, I have developed trust issues over the years to where I no longer trust people and they are going to have to show me that they are different and have to earn my trust. I have been done wrong by so many different people who claimed to be friends and those that loved me to the point I no longer am friends with anyone and became antisocial. 

I never really talked to anyone anyways due to my severe anxiety because, I feel that they will judge me and other things. I also have other mental issues and also self diagnosed myself with autism so basically, I got use to not talking to anyone really because it made me anxious and nervous. 

I rather be alone and not open up to anyone anymore because when I did and let them get to know me and actually felt comfortable, they tend to not be able to handle it and they close the box. Because of who I am, the ended up leaving me just like everyone else and never really got to even know me or why I am the way I am. They never really stayed around to understand why I am built the way I am and how I built myself up to not get hurt anymore. 

Not everyone is suppose to be around you, not everyone is suppose to be in your life. I want to see people eat, just not at my table. 

Remember everyone can leave if they want to so be careful who you let in and open up to.