I am tired of believing that something is going to work out when it feels like for the past 8 years it is not. It is like all my hopes and dreams flopped no matter how hard I chased them. My blogs hardly gets views and it doesn't matter what I write about.
The YouTube was at 93 subs then dropped and then went back to 90 subs but to get partnered its 1000 watch hours. The twitch hardly ever gets any views and barely gets subs, cheers or bits. I basically tried everything I can to get somewhere in life but being sick is finally taking a toll and pushing everything and stressing me to the point.
I tell my husband all of this asking what are we going to do and all he says is he will figure it out and basically does nothing to help comfort or even bother until I start crying and fussing and yelling and it has been 8 years and months and months and now I am sick... and it is like he does the bare minimum and I am oh so tired of it.
I wanted a home of our own, we didn't get that. I wanted to take zoo trips, beach trips, travel with the kids, make memories and we don't even do that. This is not the life I expected to be living at the age of 26.
I had so much more that I wanted to do but all I get is an I will work on it, I will find something, I will figure it out. It has been 8 years, I asked you to do something months ago and you still haven't done it. I am honestly tired of expecting you to do something and won't do it.
I am tired of being sick and having to depend on you to do things just for it not to be done.
I made myself so many promises that I basically broke them all.
The links to twitch, youtube, etc
